Conversations with Children: Vocabulary Edition

Scene: MTSS group, introducing the book Chocolate Fever.

Me: What does fever mean?
Student J: It's when you're sick...like you have a temperature and you throw up.
Student R: I think Henry is going to get chocolate chicken pox and when he grows up he'll get chocolate shingles.
Me: You've been watching too many commercials.
Student A: What are shingles?
Student R: Old people get them and they hurt.
Me: Okay...how else can you use the word fever?
Student S: It's like if you go crazy.
Me: Yes. Fever can mean a frenzy...like Bieber Fever.
Student M: Eww. I hate Justin Bieber.
Me: Okay, One Direction Fever then, it just doesn't rhyme as well.

 

Things I Learned Today

• Today's full moon is a harvest moon. Apparently every full moon in September is called a harvest moon. Moreover, every month's full moon has a specific name. 

• Karma is a REAL thing. Exhibit A: Student K is flailing around in her chair upside down and kicks the boy next to her in the head. Two hours later she is once again flailing around and goes face first over the back of her chair....then to the nurse.

• Most countries don't call the number 1,000,000,000 a billion. Incidentally, this is what a million cows look like. 

• These are a thing:

• It is physically possible to go to Target with a list of three things and leave with only three things...I KNOW RIGHT?!?!

• HTML coding is not simple but Google helps.

• I can't be bothered to download iOS7. I prefer to live in the dark ages.

• It takes 20 minutes to help 11 preschoolers brush their teeth. (This is a scientific study done by myself over the course of two days while covering lunch in a preschool classroom.)

IT'S FALL!

Last week I was all put out because it was like 9000 degrees out (which btdubs is the temperature of Earth's inner core). I wanted the hot, humid weather to GTFO and the cool, breezy fall-like weather to stay forever.

Well, I'm happy to report that Mother Nature has acquiesced to my demands. It seems like all of the sudden the PYO apple signs are out, pumpkins seem to be everywhere, and some leaves are turning pretty, pretty colors (i.e. dying).

Even the grocery store is all ready for fall.

I've started to think about my Halloween costume and I'm ready for some Hocus Pocus action. I have some fun weekends planned for the fall that I'm looking forward to. After all, fall is my favorite time of the year. I mean, I know everything is dying and getting darker and colder, but it's so pretty and there are so many things to look forward to.

BUT...today is September 15th (Happy Birthday Stephen & Olivia!) and I SAW A CHRISTMAS COMMERCIAL! WTF! There are still 100 days until Christmas.

Now it wasn't a good one like the Hershey Kiss bells or the Coke polar bears but still! A girl has to be able to eat Halloween candy before thinking about Christmas shopping. 

So for now...I celebrate fall in all it's apple and pumpkin glory.

   

A Pep Talk for all my Teacher Friends

More wise words from the Kid President:

"It's like Walt Whitman said: 'YOLO'. Except he didn't say that. But you would know that if you would read a book baby! Seriously, read a book...any book...except the vampire ones."

I'm Having a Veruca Salt Moment

And not the alternative rock band type. The "I want my golden goose and I want it now" type.

Last week Mother Nature gave us a taste of that sweet, sweet fall weather. The crisp, clean air. The blue, clear sky. The hint of changing leaves. And with that, my mind immediately switched from "Woe is me, summer has come to an end" to "OMG I LOVE FALL SO MUCH. IT'S MY FAVORITE."

But it was all rudely yanked away and is about to be replaced with heat from the center of the earth.

I mean...it's September, not July. If I didn't have to go to work tomorrow I'd be at the beach or at a lake getting my swim on. 

So now I'm all "Give me pumpkins and apples and cider donuts and baking and Halloween and gorgeous foliage...and GIVE IT TO ME NOW!"

*I also wouldn't say no to 10,000 tons of ice cream.

   

Conversations with Children: Hump Day Edition

Scene: Coming back from lunch...and probably every single Wednesday.

Student D: Miss C! Guess what day it is??
Me: August 28.
Student D: NO! Guess what day it is??
Me: It's Wednesday.
Student D: It's Hump Day.
Student R: (from across the room) Woop! Woop!
Student T: HUMP DAY!
Me: Face palm.

The Ultimate Sunday Night Blues

Well, the time has come...summer is officially over. At 8 am tomorrow morning, I will officially be back at work.

I don't know where the time went. Granted, I tutored for 6 weeks, so I really only had 3 weeks of free time but I made the most of it.

This summer:

I climbed mountains.

I visited lighthouses.

I ate lots of ice cream.

I laid on the beach.

I laughed with friends.

I read books with almost three year olds.

I made s'mores.

I cuddled with the puppy.

I started books and never finished them.

I drove ATVs.

I took tons of pictures.

I swam in oceans and lakes and ponds.

I listened to lots of music.

I raced for a cause.

I drove all over Maine.

So tonight, instead of lamenting that summer is coming to and end, I am eating chinese food and watching the MTV VMA's (even though I'm at least 10 years too old to do that) and hoping that the rumors about NSYNC's reunion are true.  ← Don't judge me.

As much as going back to school means having less 'do what I want time' it also means fall is here...which means apples and pumpkins and leaves and scarves and hot chocolate and crisp, sunny days...basically everything that is wonderful.


   

Letters are my Favorite...Spiders are NOT

Dear The Weather Channel,

I just want the weather. Not this:

Tell me how hot it will be. Tell me when it will rain. Maybe tell me when there will be a super cool moon but that's it.

XOXO,

Amy

  

An Open Letter

Dear Apartment Management,

Let me preface this by saying THIS IS MY LAST WEEK OF SUMMER VACATION and I'm trying to enjoy every single bit of it.

So imagine my regret when I answered the phone at 6:30 pm on Sunday night (I foolishly thought it might be about a job interview...on Sunday night I should have known better) and you told me you'd be here in the morning to do something to my water (I'm still unclear)...and I agreed.

Like any person enjoying their last days of vacation, I was up until 6:20 AM and dutifully set my alarm for a few hours later. I thought about just sleeping and ignoring any phone calls and/or knocking. But that would inevitably cause me anxiety and guilt. So I dragged my sleeping self out of bed, picked up the laundry, washed the dishes, and put on pants for my water testing visitors.

AND THEN, the phone rang just 5 minutes after they were supposed to be here (not too bad for apartment fixer people). But it was just you telling me that they WERE NOT coming. Are you kidding me?!

You then wanted to reschedule for Wednesday of this week. I told you that I might not be here as I might be out enjoying my last days of vacation. You claimed to understand and said, "well this is important to us but you need to do what you need to do."

Yes. Yes I do. And I don't need you to affirm that I'm allowed to leave my apartment.

Look, I understand this is a first world problem, and this absolutely wasn't the first blog post I'd write since taking a six month hiatus, but let's me real: I'm really just an 80 year old curmudgeon in a 30-something's body. ← Writing 30-something nearly gave me a panic attack. That is another post altogether.


XOXO,
Amy


P.S. As always, stay tuned for part 2: Will Amy be home on Wednesday for the water testing people?



   

I might start blogging again

There...I said it.