Showing posts with label politics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label politics. Show all posts

Friday, November 9, 2012

This.

I promise I'll stop being all political after this but I just have to say that I'm thankful that I live in a country where I can vote for a leader that I believe in. I'm proud and glad and relieved that we elected a president who understands that the world is ever changing and that we must change with it. I know that there are problems in our country...huge problems.

I understand first hand how difficult it is to find a job in the current economy. But I also understand that paying a higher tax rate than people who make my entire yearly salary in one day makes no sense. I believe that we need to invest in education because our kids are truly the future of our country. I believe that global warming is a global issue that needs to be seriously addressed. I believe that I should be able to decide what to do with my own body.

In the days since the election, so many words have been said. But I think Rachel Maddow nailed it:

"Ohio really did go to President Obama last night. And he really did win. And he really was born in Hawaii. And he really is legitimately President of the United States. Again. And the Bureau of Labor Statistics did not make up a fake unemployment rate last month. And the Congressional Research Service really can find no evidence that cutting taxes on rich people grows the economy. And the polls were not skewed to oversample Democrats. And Nate Silver was not making up fake projections about the election to make conservatives feel bad. Nate Silver was doing math. And climate change is real. And rape really does cause pregnancy sometimes. And evolution is a thing! And Benghazi was an attack ON us, it was not a scandal BY us. And nobody is taking away anyone's guns. And taxes have not gone up. And the deficit is dropping, actually. And Saddam Hussein did not have weapons of mass destruction. And the moon landing was real. And FEMA is not building concentration camps. And UN election observers are not taking over Texas. And moderate reforms of the regulations on the insurance industry and the financial services industry in this country are not the same thing as Communism.

Listen. Last night was a good night for liberals and for Democrats for very obvious reasons. But it was also, possibly, a good night for this country as a whole. Because in this country we have a two party system, in government. And the idea is supposed to be that the two sides both come up with ways to confront and fix the real problems facing our country. They both propose possible solutions to our real problems. And we debate between those possible solutions. And by the process of debate, we pick the best idea. That competition between good ideas, from both sides, about real problems in the real country should result in our country having better choices, better options, than if only one side is really working on the hard stuff. And if the Republican party, and the conservative movement, and the conservative media is stuck in a vacuum sealed, door locked, spin cycle of telling each other what makes them feel good, and denying the factual, lived truth of the world, then we are all deprived, as a nation, of the constructive debate between competing, feasible ideas about real problems.

Last night the Republicans got shellacked. And they had no idea it was coming. And we saw them, in real time, in real humiliating time, not believe it even as it was happening to them. And unless they're going to secede, they're going to have to pop the factual bubble they have been so happy living inside, if they do not want to get shellacked again. And that will be a painful process for them, I'm sure, but it will be good for the whole country - left, right, and center. You guys, we're counting on you. Wake up."


Wednesday, November 7, 2012

What 8 Year Olds Have to Say About the Election

As heard in my third grade classroom today:

"He only won because he is a witch with a 'B'."

"My brother calls Romney 'Mittens'."

"That's who my mom voted for."

"Obama is the president again."
"No he's not."
"Yes he is, my mom told me."

"I don't like him."

"Everybody voted and he won fair and square."

"More people picked him."

"If you have a sister in high school she will have a miserable time trying to find a job."

"Wasn't Obama born in Kenya?"

"Maybe Mitt Romney will run for president again."

"He lied."
"They all lied."

The moral of the story:
Your children learn from you. Teach tolerance, not hate.

Monday, October 22, 2012

Dear Mitt Romney,

We are 7 minutes into the 3rd debate. First you said we can't kill our way out of trouble in the Middle East. Two minutes later you said we need to kill the bad guys.

I'm done.

Obama better wipe the floor with you tonight because, and correct me if I'm wrong, but I think being a former governor of Massachusetts means your foreign policy experience is limited.

XOXO,
Amy

P.S. I love how Fox News is showing the MLB Playoffs instead of the debate. Even they know you don't have anything to say about foreign policy.

P.P.S. You're both whining like little bitches.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

The Town Hall Debate is My FAVORITE!

I love that the candidates get to walk around and get in each other's faces. It makes them so much more argumentative.

When discussing gas prices, they got up in each other's faces and began gesticulating wildly.

In my head I was all, "Deck him. Deck him. Deck him." I don't care who hit who, but I wanted to see a someone throw a punch.


Obama: "Bitch please."


Obama: What.


Romney: "Pointing is rude."


Romney: "But I'm not done talking yet."


Good Question: Governor Romney, how are you different from George Bush?

Romney: Let me have the last word on the last question. I believe all women should have contraceptives.

????


Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Me Trying to Watch the Presidential Debate

Me: Okay, I already know who I'm voting for but let's do this. Educate me Mr. President.

Jim Lehrer: How are you going to fix the world?

Obama: Happy Anniversary Michelle!

Romney: Congrats on your anniversary bro.

Jim Lehrer: Okay but really, how are you going to fix the economy?

Romney: My plan is best. Can't give you details but it's the best.

Obama: Your plan DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!

Romney: (Side smirk) Yes it does.

Obama: Then explain it.

Romney: I don't have to 'cause it's the best.

Jim Lehrer: Next segment. Tell us how you much you disagree about social security.

Obama: Actually we agree. Let's talk about medicare and my grandma instead.

Romney: Old people are fine. Let's make young people buy private insurance even though they can't afford it.

Obama: (Side Smirk)

Jim Lehrer: We'll talk about health care later.

Romney: No. I want to talk about it now.

Obama: Me too. One last point.

Romney: One last point.

Jim Lehrer: But, but, but.

Romney: But I still have one last point. Let's talk about...

Jim Lehrer: No let's not.

Me: Dear Romney, stop being so fucking rude and respect the rules of the debate!

Romney: (Side Smirk)

Me: Medicare to banks in 3.2 seconds...I give up. I'm going to bed.


Edit: Romney and Obama apparently do not know/understand the rules of a debate.
 
 

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

My Fellow Americans

Dear The United States,

I have a quick suggestion. What do you say to moving up the national election to next Tuesday? Or perhaps the Tuesday after that if we still need time to print ballots. It's not like everyone doesn't already know who they will be voting for. (And if you don't, what the hell are you waiting for? Inform yourself and make a decision!)

So let's just make it official already. This will be a mutually beneficial solution. We won't have to watch any more political advertisements; and you can take the millions (billions?) of dollars you were planning on spending in the next two months and send it to Chicago so we can get the teachers and their students back into the classroom.

How do we make this happen?

XOXO,
Amy

 

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

American History > Riding Horses

Dear Appropriate Governmental Agency,

I address this letter to you because I am a woefully fake American who doesn't really know where my tax dollars go.  (But let's be frank...do you really know where my tax dollars go?)

The purpose of this letter is to inquire if my tax dollars are being used to train police officers to ride horses and act like douchebags.

I am almost certain that some of my tax dollars are being appropriated to the training of state and local police officers.  While my knowledge of police training ends with the movie Police Academy, I am assuming that different types of officers require different skill sets.  Do mall cops require the same training as the Staties who pull people over on the Mass Pike?  Do the cops who stand in safety green vests talking to construction workers for six hours a day attend the same training facility as cops who actually fight crime?

But seriously, is horse riding part of the Police Academy core curriculum? 

If it is, I would like to politely decline the government's invitation to pay my taxes...at least towards the horse riding portion of police training.  I would also like to request that any taxes already paid be redistributed to aid the failing struggling education system.  This should be mutually beneficial.  Schools will begin hiring again leading me to gainful employment where I will gladly teach 10 year olds American History so they don't end up like Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann.  A teaching job will move me into a higher tax bracket which will then result in more tax dollars to train new recruits how to ride horses.

Let's make this happen.

XOXO,
Amy

P.S.  If this is not a fiscally viable option for you, maybe we could begin to lower the national debt by cutting Horse Back Riding 101 and Intro to Douchbaggery from the Police Academy course catalog.


    

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Why I Can't Sleep: POTUS Edition

Truth:  I wish I could list the names of all 44 Presidents of the United States of America (or POTUS).  Merely listing POTUS names tends to lean more towards trivia rather than knowledge of the history of my country...but hey...a girl's gotta start somewhere.

In elementary school some classes learned a song that listed all the POTUS names in chronological order.  My class did not.  (However, I can name all 50 U.S. states in alphabetical order because of the song Fifty Nifty United States.)

If I put pen to paper right now I could probably name 28-30 POTUS...which is only 68%...pretty pathetic.  But before you judge me I challenge you to stop reading and write down as many POTUS names you can think of.  How many did you list?  (If you teach U.S. History you are excluded from this challenge.)

In my head I group presidents into random categories which leads to both repeating and forgetting a lot of names.

Starting at the present and listing chronologically backwards I can name:
Obama
Bush
Clinton
Bush
Reagan
Carter
Ford
Nixon

I can also list repeat last name presidents such as:
Lyndon Johnson
Andrew Johnson (then I remember Andrew Jackson)
Teddy Roosevelt
Franklin Roosevelt
George Bush
George W. Bush
John Adams
John Quincy Adams

I know some early presidents:
Washington
Adams
Jefferson
Madison
Adams

There are the presidents known by their initials:
LBJ
FDR
JFK

Assassinated/Important presidents:
Lincoln
Kennedy
Garfield
(and I know there was a fourth president that was assassinated but I can never remember his name)

Then there are presidents I know by name for random reasons:
Eisenhower and Hoover (war?)
Millard Filmore (?)
Taft (was fat)
Polk (I always think he was the one with polio because of the letters in his name)
Van Buren (because I went to school with a Martin Van Buren)
William Henry Harrison (he gave a long inaugural speech, caught pneumonia and died)
Grover Cleveland (he was president for two terms but not in a row so he counts twice)

And...that's about it.  I know I'm missing about 14 or so.

Incidentally, there are also people who I think were president that were not...Sam Adams, Paul Rudd Revere, Ben Franklin and Alexander Hamilton (because the last two are on our money.)

Someday Amy, someday.  Maybe I need flashcards...or that song.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Don't Ask Don't Tell

I cannot even believe that this is a conversation that people are wasting time and breath on. If you have men and women who are willing and able to risk their lives to defend their country, why does it matter who they bed?

I typically refrain from talking politics because it tends to isolate people very quickly. However, I'm all riled up after watching The Daily Show tonight. This bill was heavily supported by both Republicans and Democrats, but because each side always wants more they added all this extra crap and the bill ended up not passing. Are you kidding me? Why must everything be so partisan? Why can't Congress just vote on the issue at hand? "Don't Ask Don't Tell...Yes or No?"

Politics drives me fucking crazy.

P.S. I get my news from The Daily Show because watching the "real" news makes me want to punch myself in the face.
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