What People Do When it Snows

Back in college I was a sociology major for a semester or two. If I remember correctly, sociology is the study of social behavior?

Today I woke up super early despite having the day off of school. I decided I should prepare for this mega storm and headed to the grocery store. Here is what I discovered...

With the impending storm, people exhibit certain habits. They run to the store and buy cans of tuna, baking supplies, prepared meals, packaged cold cuts, apples, and bread. I get it. You can make tuna or PB sandwiches, eat apples and cookies all with no power.

People also buy bags of candy, chicken, ice cream, frozen pizza, yogurt (especially Chobani) and cookie dough. I guess blizzard is code for binge-fest. With the exception of raw chicken and frozen pizza, you can just nom it all if the power goes out.

Also I found this:

I don't really know what to say about this.

I've never understood the whole buying milk thing. If the power goes out, it will be one of the first things to go bad. This guy really needed his milk and bread though.

Pretty much every New Englander.

I also don't really understand the gas thing...unless it's gas for a generator? Why gas up a car you won't be able to drive? The first gas station I drove by HAD NO GAS LEFT. It was like the f'ing apocalypse. Luckily I live in a tiny town and my local gas station had gas and looked like this:

So I now have a full tank of gas (for what I'm not sure), some cereal, Cheez-its, and Clif Bars. I'm excited about the prospect of thunder snow but I already have cabin fever. Let's just hope it's light, fluffy snow that is easy to shovel.

   

I Don't Even...

How many people did you see bleed today?  Because I saw two...and that was two too many!

It all started when I agreed to play teacher today because the teacher I work with was absent.  The kids were crazy sauce because they are getting psyched about Christmas and tomorrow we are going on a field trip in the snow.

First, I made a kid cry.  I was teaching a writing lesson (that bombed p.s.) on choosing more exciting verbs.  But second graders don't write action verbs they write entire stories consisting of I had... and I went.  So a boy cried because he couldn't handle it.

Then, we were doing a science activity.  The kids were observing gravel and salt and they were allowed to smell the items.  Although we reviewed the correct way to smell items in science (wafting), a boy stuck his nose into the cup full of salt and exhaled. The salt flew out of the cup, got in his eyes and stuck to his face.  A quick rinse in the sink and a trip to the nurse and he was as good as new.

Second graders still don't have wonderful body control and while packing up two kids bumped heads and a nose bleed ensued.

Tears: 2
Nurse: 2

I left work with my mind set upon stopping at home to change then heading straight for the gym.  On the way home I had a similar yet more serious experience as the camel sighting. I saw a person lying on the sidewalk in the rain.  In two seconds my brain went from "there is a person on the sidewalk, that can't be good" to "why would a person be on the sidewalk" to "OH MY GOD THAT IS A PERSON ON THE SIDEWALK!"

I pulled over my car, threw on my flashers and ran over to him wondering what I would find when I got to him.  He was an older gentleman out for a walk in the rain who had fallen and was bleeding from the face in several places.  I didn't have my phone with me so luckily another gentleman pulled over and called 911.  The older man insisted he was fine and live only 200 yards away but we called 911 anyways. Let me tell you...the 6 minutes we waited for the ambulance were some of the longest minutes of my life.  I didn't know whether to talk to him or take off his hat to see if I should try to stop the bleeding.  <----This is why I am not a nurse.

FYI: In a small town when you call 911 for a man who has fallen down and cut his face, an ambulance, a firetruck, a police car and a police SUV show up.  The EMT's knew the man (apparently this has happened before), cleaned him up, and (I hope) drove him home.

After all of that, I still jumped in my car and went to the gym...and sat in traffic on the way because there was a giant accident.  Today was crazy.

Other possible titles for this post:

Small Town Living: Medical Emergency Edition

Amy Plays Teacher: And Maims Some Kids

Today HAS to be a Full Moon

Commitment

Apparently it's Going to Snow

Today Was Crazy

  

Three Day Weekend!

Let's discuss how many agencies contacted me about storm/school cancellations.

1. The police department of the town I live in called to say school was closed.
2. The town I used to work in left a voicemail that school was closed.
3. The town I worked in 2 jobs ago texted me to tell me that school was closed.
4. The superintendent called to tell me school was closed.
5. The next town over (they handle my electricity) called to let me know school was closed (and that trick or treating was rescheduled).

So...the moral of the story is:  SCHOOL IS CLOSED...oh...and don't go trick or treating tomorrow because Halloween is basically cancelled.

No worries...I didn't get to wear my costume and I never carved a pumpkin (because after last year's debacle I was exercising some patience which was interrupted by all the snow).

    

Happy 4th of July!

I celebrated Uncle Sam's birthday by taking in a parade and some UVA and B rays.  D&O left the big city to attend a small town but very important parade.  We had to weave through some orange cones to find a parking spot but then got to park under this gem.

If you recall, I made fun of mocked attempted to survive the Rapture of 2011.  Turns out...I also survived the Rapture of 1992 without even knowing it!  Even more impressive is the fact that this poster is still rockin' after 19 years stuck to a pole.

We made our way to the parade and met up with S and baby.  S was psyched...baby was not.

We saw tiny firetrucks.

And lots of Minutemen

Some of whom were more prepared than others.

But they all shot guns which...let's be frank...is all that really mattered.

There was a kidlet sized fife and drum corps...

and bagpipes ---> my fave!

Actually...there were all kinds of bands.  Bands that rode.

Toy soldier bands that marched by without playing.

Canadian bands with angry drummers.

And professional bands with bad ass precision (and fancy plumage).

There were boy cub scouts with awesome floats and water guns.

And for some reason the Corvettes were replaced with tractors.  O was psyched!

After the parade we took in some shade and soft serve.  Our waitress was not confident with her soft serve serving abilities so it came in a bowl.  A giant bowl because she felt bad that she couldn't put it on the cone.

So I put it on the cone...

I bet she could have done better.  To top off the day I caught some fireworks at The Capitol.

I'll also catch the Boston Pops fireworks at 10:30. 

I'm not the most patriotic person but I totally geek out over Stars and Stripes Forever and the 1812 Overture.  #File under: Yes I was in marching band.

   

It's Not Just Mud Season...

...it's also apparently road kill season.

Over the past few days I have seen an inordinate number of dead animals on the side of the highway.  (None of which were my fault.  My kill count remains at two.)

I've seen:
Hawk (3)
Owl
Skunk (2)
Deer
Raccoon
Porcupine
Fox
Coyote
Squirrel (804*)

Is this because I live in the woods a small town?  Has anyone else noticed this?  Am I imagining things or does the whole melting snow/mating season thing really drive the roadkill count up during the spring?

* An estimate.

Small Town Living: Episode 37

When you live in a small town:

Cops pull over their friends that they haven't seen in a while for a chat.  They block an entire lane of traffic and interfere with the evening commute just so they can catch up.