An Open Letter

Dear Apartment Management,

Let me preface this by saying THIS IS MY LAST WEEK OF SUMMER VACATION and I'm trying to enjoy every single bit of it.

So imagine my regret when I answered the phone at 6:30 pm on Sunday night (I foolishly thought it might be about a job interview...on Sunday night I should have known better) and you told me you'd be here in the morning to do something to my water (I'm still unclear)...and I agreed.

Like any person enjoying their last days of vacation, I was up until 6:20 AM and dutifully set my alarm for a few hours later. I thought about just sleeping and ignoring any phone calls and/or knocking. But that would inevitably cause me anxiety and guilt. So I dragged my sleeping self out of bed, picked up the laundry, washed the dishes, and put on pants for my water testing visitors.

AND THEN, the phone rang just 5 minutes after they were supposed to be here (not too bad for apartment fixer people). But it was just you telling me that they WERE NOT coming. Are you kidding me?!

You then wanted to reschedule for Wednesday of this week. I told you that I might not be here as I might be out enjoying my last days of vacation. You claimed to understand and said, "well this is important to us but you need to do what you need to do."

Yes. Yes I do. And I don't need you to affirm that I'm allowed to leave my apartment.

Look, I understand this is a first world problem, and this absolutely wasn't the first blog post I'd write since taking a six month hiatus, but let's me real: I'm really just an 80 year old curmudgeon in a 30-something's body. ← Writing 30-something nearly gave me a panic attack. That is another post altogether.


XOXO,
Amy


P.S. As always, stay tuned for part 2: Will Amy be home on Wednesday for the water testing people?



   

Oscar Thoughts

• I can't believe they get $70,000 swag bags.  (I'm in the wrong business!)
• I seriously thought Tinker Toy Soldier movie was a G.I. Joe film and expected Channing Tatum or Jake Gyllenhall to be in it.  (It's not.)
• I really wanted Viola Davis to win but I'm glad Meryl won because apparently the last time she won was the year I was born. (And we all know how long ago that was!)
• I'm annoyed that The Artist won because I have no desire to see it.
• I do want to see The Descendants but I want to read the book first.
• I just spent the last 5 hours on the couch.
• The Oscars are too long. It is now 12:01 on Monday morning and I have to wake up for school soon because vacation is OVER.

3:30 AM

What were you doing at 3:30 am on Sunday night?

Hanging out with your landlord watching water rain out of your bathroom ceiling vent?

ME TOO!

Let me rewind. I returned home from the big birthday bash at the casino of the sun at noon on Sunday. The paint on my bathroom ceiling was swollen with water and small cracks were forming. I put a towel under the drips and put off calling my landlord until I had a chance to pick up my apartment a bit.

Fast forward...parent's house...dinner...Super Bowl...back home. I furiously cleaned my apartment then tried to hit the sack but I couldn't sleep because the dripping sound was bouncing around inside my head. I finally drifted off about midnight only to be abruptly woken up 2:30 am but the sound of rushing water. Upon investigation I found water raining out of my bathroom ceiling vent at a steady pace. I put a bucket under it and attempted to sleep again but it was soo loud. After getting up to check on the mess at 3:00 am, the bucket was filling quickly.

I texted my landlord at 3:00 am and made a tinfoil slide for the water to drain into the sink. It was at this point that I realized that I was not going to school/work in the morning. I slept 3 hours on Saturday night and 2.5 on Sunday night. It was raining inside my apartment and I had to drive to Worcester to run an errand today.

My landlord arrived after 3:30 am, shut the water off to the building and called the property manager. But hours later it was going on 6:00 am and the dripping was minimal. The landlord left, I crawled back in bed and woke at 10:00 for a day full of errand running.

Birthday recaps are coming but are temporarily on hold because things have been crazy in the life and times of Amy.

It's a good thing I'm no stranger to apartment flooding.

   

The Blahs...

I've got 'em.*

And I hope to shake them soon.  Last night wasn't your typical "Eww, it's Sunday and I have to go to work tomorrow" night.  Instead, it was a sleepless night complete with the first melt down of the New Year.  (P.S. do you only capitalize New Year when you are referring to the actual holiday event and not the year as a whole?) I was feeling overwhelmed by my financial situation, social situations, finding a job for this summer/next school year which quickly spiraled into being unhappy with my current job, current fitness level and current living situation which always ends in the idea that I will die alone.  Don't judge me...at least I can admit I'm a hot mess.

But after some calming down from my work besties and repeated listenings of this song:

I'm feeling a bit more like a normal person.

But it's the little things, the little things not expectation
That make life worth living, worth living <---These lines get me every time.

I'm still a mess...but a more socially acceptable mess.  Here's hoping for a better tomorrow.

*I blame the full moon.

 

4:47 AM

So it's 4:47 AM and I'm awake.  After 4 blissful hours of sleep, I awoke thinking about a lesson I (forgot) I am teaching on Monday and have now been awake for an hour and a half.

In my pursuit to fall back to sleep, I made the following mistakes:
I tossed and turned.
I turned on the light.
I got out of bed.
I had a snack.
I made some notes for my lesson.
I turned on the TV (The X-Files are on).
I turned on my (borrowed) computer.
I added some notes to my book outline.
I checked Google Reader.
I decided I needed to blog about why I am awake in the middle of the night.

But now:
My toes are cold.
My eye lids are heavy.
The X-Files is almost over.
It is still dark out.
The words in my head are now on paper a flash drive.
I am ready to go back to sleep.

Coming later today:  Cooking with Amy.  Get excited.

  

Right Now

Picture this:  I have to wake up in 7 hours to get ready before setting off on Weddingpalooza: D&O Get Married so naturally I am sitting here with my face covered in a face mask.  Basically I look like this:

except I am not wearing a plant. 

Until 10 pm tonight I didn't have a dress to wear to this wedding.  I thought I could be crafty and make one.  And when that didn't work, I thought I could make a different one.  And just for good measure I thought I could make one more.  But now I finally have something to wear so I will not be the girl at the wedding in jeans and a tank top.

I have yet to pack (or decide what to pack), shower, paint my toenails, shave, or sleep.  Ugh.  Reinventing hot mess since 1982.

I have to go wash this thing off my face now...THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!

   

Mad Libs: "Everyday A" Edition

Dear ______________,

It annoys me that you are __________ again.  Also, why do you have two _______________?  Just because you got ___________ you now have a whole new _____________ on _________?  You _______on __________ saying that something _____________ happened.  Is this a ________ for _________?  When people give you that _____________ you refuse to ___________.  It's reminiscent of a _______ year old who says, "I have a __________ but I can't __________ you."

Seriously?

XOXO,
Amy

File under: #Why I can't sleep, #Because I'm annoyed, #Who wants to play?

Why I Can't Sleep: POTUS Edition

Truth:  I wish I could list the names of all 44 Presidents of the United States of America (or POTUS).  Merely listing POTUS names tends to lean more towards trivia rather than knowledge of the history of my country...but hey...a girl's gotta start somewhere.

In elementary school some classes learned a song that listed all the POTUS names in chronological order.  My class did not.  (However, I can name all 50 U.S. states in alphabetical order because of the song Fifty Nifty United States.)

If I put pen to paper right now I could probably name 28-30 POTUS...which is only 68%...pretty pathetic.  But before you judge me I challenge you to stop reading and write down as many POTUS names you can think of.  How many did you list?  (If you teach U.S. History you are excluded from this challenge.)

In my head I group presidents into random categories which leads to both repeating and forgetting a lot of names.

Starting at the present and listing chronologically backwards I can name:
Obama
Bush
Clinton
Bush
Reagan
Carter
Ford
Nixon

I can also list repeat last name presidents such as:
Lyndon Johnson
Andrew Johnson (then I remember Andrew Jackson)
Teddy Roosevelt
Franklin Roosevelt
George Bush
George W. Bush
John Adams
John Quincy Adams

I know some early presidents:
Washington
Adams
Jefferson
Madison
Adams

There are the presidents known by their initials:
LBJ
FDR
JFK

Assassinated/Important presidents:
Lincoln
Kennedy
Garfield
(and I know there was a fourth president that was assassinated but I can never remember his name)

Then there are presidents I know by name for random reasons:
Eisenhower and Hoover (war?)
Millard Filmore (?)
Taft (was fat)
Polk (I always think he was the one with polio because of the letters in his name)
Van Buren (because I went to school with a Martin Van Buren)
William Henry Harrison (he gave a long inaugural speech, caught pneumonia and died)
Grover Cleveland (he was president for two terms but not in a row so he counts twice)

And...that's about it.  I know I'm missing about 14 or so.

Incidentally, there are also people who I think were president that were not...Sam Adams, Paul Rudd Revere, Ben Franklin and Alexander Hamilton (because the last two are on our money.)

Someday Amy, someday.  Maybe I need flashcards...or that song.

This Is What I Get For Reading Crime Thrillers Before Bed...

This may or may not have just happened...but it did.

*FYI: I am currently reading The Girl Who Played With Fire.

After reading for a while, I turned out the light and I snuggled in bed with my iPod.  Now if you know me, you know that I like to tempt deafness with the volume of my music.  So...I'm listening to this French song and I hear something in the other room.  My eyes snap open, my heart finds a new rhythm, and I hear it again. 

By now I am totally freaking out because someone has obviously broken into my apartment.  So I climb out of bed and grab the aluminum baseball bat that my dad insisted I keep near my bed...which I am very grateful for at this point because the biggest knife I own is only 4 inches long and is currently in the dishwasher.

I tiptoe down the hallway in the dark and with my bat at the ready, I peak around the corner and see a tall man standing in the shadows of my living room.  I am certain that he can hear my heart beating and is about to kill me so I flip on the light ready to smash some skull with my bat. 

Here's the part where I feel like an idiot...I almost assaulted my Christmas tree.  Funny in retrospect but at the time I seriously thought I was going to end up on the news.  So now I am wide awake with no intent on ever sleeping again.  I have checked the locks and the windows, made sure my cell is charged and next to my bed, and removed that song from my sleep mix. 

It turns out the sounds I heard were actually timpani drums.  Good to know that my fight or flight instinct remains intact.

Why I Can't Sleep

True story...

It is 2:30 in the morning and I finally decide it's time for bed.  I go into the bathroom to brush my teeth and there is some type of insect on the floor.  It is either a spider with only 6 legs, a beetle of some sort, or a baby cricket.  My immediate reaction is to kill it because it is a bug and the less of them the better...but then I remember that killing crickets violates the laws of luck. 

So what does this girl do?  She traps the bug under a cup and uses Google Images to look up crickets.  It turns out that it is a cricket, so instead of squashing or flushing it, she spares its life and releases it into the hallway (hey it's cold and dark outside...if the cricket is smart enough it will figure out how to hop out the door when someone opens it.)

But now I am all skeeved out from looking at pictures of crickets and I just keep imagining if I had gone to bed earlier I wouldn't have seen the cricket and it might have hopped into bed with me.